If I were a member of one of the baby basher gangs

If I were a member of one of the baby basher gangs, I'd change my name, get a new fake passport, shave my head bald, lay my hands on all the cash I could muster, and haul ass, because staying here behind is gonna mean weekend visitation for your family members and nightly visitation by Bubba. You lying, thieving bastards are gonna get your just rewards one day soon. Just keep up your crap. That day is coming!!!! To everyone else, have a most outstanding weekend.

Lord, help me to be the person that my dogs think I am...