.It's Hell to be Old..  ...Problems that you have

.It's Hell to be Old.. 
...Problems that you haven't Even considered yet! 

..An 85-year-old man was requested by his 
Doctor for a sperm count as part of his physical 
Exam. 

..The doctor gave the man a jar and said, 'Take 
This jar home and bring back a semen sample 
Tomorrow.' 

..The next day the 85-year-old man reappeared 
At the doctor's office and gave him the jar, 
Which was as clean and empty as on the 
Previous day. 

..The doctor asked what happened and the man 
Explained, 'Well, doc, it's like this -- first I tried 
With my right hand, but nothing. Then I tried 
With my left hand, but still nothing. 

..'Then I asked my wife for help. She tried with 
Her right hand, then with her left, still nothing. 
She tried with her mouth, first with the teeth in, 
Then with her teeth out, still nothing. 

..'We even called up Arleen, the lady next door 
And she tried too, first with both hands, then an 
Armpit, and she even tried squeezin' it between 
Her knees, but still nothing..' 

..The doctor was shocked! 
'You asked your neighbour?'..The old man replied, 

....'Yep, none of us could get the jar open.'