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Football season is here.  Ohio State 's Urban Mey

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Post# of 3036
Posted On: 08/21/2013 7:57:32 PM
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Posted By: acc724
Football season is here. 
Ohio State 's Urban Meyer on one of his players: "He doesn't know the meaning of the word fear. In fact, I just saw his grades and he doesn't know the meaning of a lot of words." 
___________________________________________ 

Why do Tennessee fans wear orange? 
So they can dress that way for the game on Saturday, go hunting on Sunday, and pick up trash on Monday. 
___________________________________________ 

What does the average Alabama player get on his SATs? 
Drool. 
___________________________________________ 

How many Michigan freshmen football players does it take to change a light bulb? 

None. That's a sophomore course. 
___________________________________________ 

How did the Georgia football player die from drinking milk? 

The cow fell on him. 
___________________________________________ 

Two Texas A&M football players were walking in the woods. 

One of them said, "Look, a dead bird." 

The other looked up in the sky and said, "Where?" 
___________________________________________ 

A University of Cincinnati football player was almost killed yesterday in a tragic horseback-riding accident. 

He fell from a horse and was nearly trampled to death. 

Luckily, the manager of the Wal-Mart came out and unplugged the horse. ___________________________________________ 
What do you say to a Michigan State University football player dressed in a three-piece suit? " 

"Will the defendant please rise." 
___________________________________________ 

If three Florida State football players are in the same car, who is driving? 

The police officer. 
___________________________________________ 

How can you tell if an Auburn football player has a girlfriend? 

There's tobacco juice on both sides of the pickup truck. 
___________________________________________ 

What do you get when you put 32 Arkansas cheerleaders in one room? 

A full set of teeth. 
___________________________________________ 

University of Michigan Coach Brady Hoke is only going to dress half of his players for the game this week; the other half will have to dress themselves. 
___________________________________________ 

How is the Indiana football team like an opossum? 
They play dead at home and get killed on the road. 
___________________________________________ 

Why did the Nebraska linebacker steal a police car? 

He saw "911" on the side and thought it was a Porsche. 
___________________________________________ 

How do you get a former Illinois football player off your porch? 

Pay him for the pizza. 



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