US passport Rant,
Subject: Application for a passport
Dear Mrs. Ms. Or Sir: I'm in the process of renewing my passport and
still cannot believe this. How is it that Radio Shack has my address
and telephone number and knows that I bought a cable TV from them in
1987 (26 years ago), and yet, the Federal Government is still asking me
where I was born and on what date. For Christ sakes, do you guys do
this by hand? Ever heard of computers?
My birth date you have in my social security file. It’s on EVERY income
tax form I've filed for the past 30 years. It's on my Medicare health
insurance card and my driver's license, it's on the last eight damn
passports I've had, it's on every stupid customs declaration form I've
had to fill out before being allowed off the plane for the last 30
years. And it's on all those census forms that we have to do at
election times. Would somebody please take note, once and for all, that
my mother's name is Maryanne, my father's name is Robert and I'm
reasonably confident that neither name is likely to change between now
and when I die.
Between you an' me, I've had enough of this bureaucratic bullshit!
You send the application to my house, then you ask me for my #*&#%*&
address. What is going on? You must have a gang of bureaucratic
Neanderthal morons working there! Look at my damn picture. Do I look
like Bin Laden? And "No," I don't want to dig up Yasser Arafat, for
shit sakes. I just want to go and park my ass on a sandy beach. And
would someone please tell me, why would you give a damn whether I plan
on visiting a farm in the next 15 days? If I ever got the urge to do
something weird to a chicken or a goat, believe you me, I'd sure as
hell not want to tell anyone!
Well, I have to go now because I have to go to the other end of the
city and get another #*@&#^@*@& copy of my birth certificate to the
tune of $100. Would it be so difficult to have all the services in the
same area so I could get a new passport the same day? Nooooo, that
would require planning and organization. And it would be too logical
for the @&^*^%@% government. You'd rather have us running all over the
place like chickens with our heads cut off. Then, we have to find some
asshole to confirm that it's really me in the damn picture - you know,
the one where we're not allowed to smile...Hey, you know why we can't
smile? We're totally pissed off!
Signed - An Irate Citizen.
P.S. Remember what I wrote about getting someone to confirm that the
picture is me? Well, my family has been in the United States of America
since 1776. I have served in the military for something over 35 years
and have had security clearances up the ying yang. However, I have to
get someone important to verify who I am - you know, someone like my
doctor....WHO WAS BORN AND RAISED IN INDIA! And you assholes want to
run our health care system?????
US passport Rant, Subject: Application for a passport Dear
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