Alcohol, tobacco & firearms! Sounds like my last
family reunion plus 15 buckets of KFC original.
Stop naming hospitals after dead people.
Give us some hope, where's the Keith Richards Memorial Hospital?
I met a giant once. I didn't know what to say,
so I just used big words.
Hear about the peep hole in girl's locker room?
Police are looking into it.
Did you about the stolen dog collar?
Police are looking for leads.
What's this world coming to?....
I read that people are dying now that have never died before.
At my age, I have social security sex...........
I get a little each month, but not enough to live on.
Trump: “I need to find a way to get to 270.”
J.D.: “Maybe you could give up McDonald’s, Sir.”
An Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a pub.
The Scotsman says "Drinks for everyone in the house, on me. I'm paying everybody's tab for the night!" The pub erupts in cheers.
The next day, the headline of the front page of the newspaper read "Irish ventriloquist found beaten to death behind local pub"
The phrase "Don't take this the wrong way"
has a zero percent success rate.
At some point in my life I switched from taking acid to taking antacid.
Cleavage is like the sun, if you're wearing dark
glasses you can look at them longer without injury .
Did you hear about the pig farmer who joined a
terrorist organization ?...................................................................Ham-ass.
If I can say one good thing about my wife's cooking, it broke the dog from begging at the dinner table
If attacked by a bear, play dead.
It will be good practice for when you die a few minutes later.
I'm into fitness.
Right now I'm fitness large maple bar in my mouth
A man and a woman CAN be just friends without there being any sex involved...
It's called marriage.
Just to clarify...
I'm not fat, I am just a few meals ahead and a few shits behind..
When I look in a mirror and see grey hair, tiny wrinkles and dimming eyes.
I think, "They sure don't make mirrors like they used to."
There's a new AI GPS on the market for seniors.
It not only tells us how to get to a place, but also why we wanted to go there.
John Doe rented his house to Mr. and Mrs. Ellswoth Weevil, and immediately became the lessor of two Weevils.
Source, SHORENIFFSTUFF @oHub
family reunion plus 15 buckets of KFC original.
Stop naming hospitals after dead people.
Give us some hope, where's the Keith Richards Memorial Hospital?
I met a giant once. I didn't know what to say,
so I just used big words.
Hear about the peep hole in girl's locker room?
Police are looking into it.
Did you about the stolen dog collar?
Police are looking for leads.
What's this world coming to?....
I read that people are dying now that have never died before.
At my age, I have social security sex...........
I get a little each month, but not enough to live on.
Trump: “I need to find a way to get to 270.”
J.D.: “Maybe you could give up McDonald’s, Sir.”
An Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a pub.
The Scotsman says "Drinks for everyone in the house, on me. I'm paying everybody's tab for the night!" The pub erupts in cheers.
The next day, the headline of the front page of the newspaper read "Irish ventriloquist found beaten to death behind local pub"
The phrase "Don't take this the wrong way"
has a zero percent success rate.
At some point in my life I switched from taking acid to taking antacid.
Cleavage is like the sun, if you're wearing dark
glasses you can look at them longer without injury .
Did you hear about the pig farmer who joined a
terrorist organization ?...................................................................Ham-ass.
If I can say one good thing about my wife's cooking, it broke the dog from begging at the dinner table
If attacked by a bear, play dead.
It will be good practice for when you die a few minutes later.
I'm into fitness.
Right now I'm fitness large maple bar in my mouth
A man and a woman CAN be just friends without there being any sex involved...
It's called marriage.
Just to clarify...
I'm not fat, I am just a few meals ahead and a few shits behind..
When I look in a mirror and see grey hair, tiny wrinkles and dimming eyes.
I think, "They sure don't make mirrors like they used to."
There's a new AI GPS on the market for seniors.
It not only tells us how to get to a place, but also why we wanted to go there.
John Doe rented his house to Mr. and Mrs. Ellswoth Weevil, and immediately became the lessor of two Weevils.
Source, SHORENIFFSTUFF @oHub
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