He Shall Be Known Henceforth as Kevin McLeadership
Friday, September 29th, 2023
https://showercapblog.com/he-shall-be-known-h...eadership/
Remember, this is the Republican Party when they’ve had plenty of time to prepare. A presidential primary debate. The impeachment hearing they’ve dreamt of since Biden first whooped their boy’s ass. As we gather here to gape at ineptitude that simply should not be possible at this rung on the evolutionary ladder, never forget…they are sending their very, very best.
Our expectations of Speaker McCarthy have crumbled to the point where it qualifies as breaking news whenever he manages to navigate a basic procedural vote without lighting his own scrotum on fire. Seriously, I got a CNN push notification this morning: “Holy crud, took him a week, but the little dweeb actually managed to open debate on his doomed continuing resolution!”
I suppose it’s marginally more impressive when you note he pulled it off with Matt Gaetz nipping at his heels, (and you’ll want to get any bites checked out by a medical professional right away, Kev) gleefully plotting his overthrow.
Anyway, Kevin was permitted scarcely a moment to bask in the triumphal push notification glow before twenty-one members of his feral caucus torpedoed the CR, sending Gaetz once more a-braying before the assembled cameras.
However, anticipating failure, McCarthy had previously dispatched Jims Comer and Jordan on a last minute mission to make the American public believe their government is so gobsmackingly fucking stupid that none of us will ever be safe until it’s shut down forever. And if they didn’t quite pull it off, well, it wasn’t for want of trying.
https://newrepublic.com/article/175870/comer-...nt-hearing
It’s baffling that anyone anywhere expects success from these clowns at this point, isn’t it? We’ve been watching James Comer drop bowling ball after bowling ball on his own groin, from increasingly great heights, since January. Who on Earth imagined this overmatched clod could pull an impeachment inquiry off?
https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/congress/hou...rcna117657
Honestly, whether you were amused or appalled that he called witnesses who testified that there’s no evidence supporting impeachment, you certainly weren’t surprised. Of course, no one expected Jimmy to clear the “impossibly high bar” of actually proving his asinine claims.
Indeed, after numerous traumatic collisions with reality, the would-be impeachers retreated to their alternate reality safe space on Hannity, where there are no pesky journalists or former Ukrainian Presidents to debunk their bullshit.
https://www.mediamatters.org/fox-news/after-d...at-hannity
Coming to theatres this Xmas, from the director of My Son Hunter: DEAD GRIFT WALKING, the heart-rending tale of one con man’s family business receiving the “corporate death penalty” following years of brazen, unrepentant fraud. Starring Sean Penn as the Trump Organization, and Louise Linton, who’s garnering Oscar buzz as some sort of hot, evil nun.
Hey, speaking of the death penalty, the 45th President of the United States and current Republican frontrunner celebrated Mark Milley’s retirement by publicly calling for the outgoing Chairman of the Joint Chiefs’ execution, part of his election season ratcheting-up of the ol’ stochastic terror apparatus.
(Maybe that’s what the Glock was for, but alas, the indicted are prohibited from purchasing murder machines, so the Dotard narrowly avoided a 92nd charge there. Ah well, he wouldn’t have been able to fire it anyway, with those stunted, ineffectual phalanges.)
Equally executable (with an emphasis on CUTE) are pop diva Taylor Swift and her rumored new beau, extra-fancy football man Travis Kelce, who earned Cult45’s wrath by virtue of being successful, and vaccinated. Oh, and I guess Travis has done Bud Light commercials, so he’s just perfect for the Two Minutes Hate.
https://slate.com/culture/2023/09/taylor-swif...-news.html
Now Th’Federalist says Swift’s music is responsible for the downfall of western civilization, granting hip hop and unwed mothers a welcome respite. Various creeps n’ incels proclaimed her “homely” and a “gold digger.” And yes, Stew Peters would like to see the happy couple put to death. It’s all very healthy and normal.
For reasons that’re far from clear, Nikki Haley and the However Many Dwarves gathered at the Ronald Reagan Memorial Wiffle Ball Field to bicker over who gets to give the last concession speech in the humiliatingly-not-even-about-the-veep-slot-anymore “Republican primary.”
Tim Scott suggested “Johnson’s Great Society” was harder for Black families to survive than slavery, which I’ll grant was expertly targeted pandering, and if he can figure out how to get over the more, ahem, obvious hurdles in his path, Tim might just have a future in this white nationalist resentment cult.
Beyond that, outside of some controversy over an alleged epidemic of teachers fornicating, the evening primarily involved the purgatorial torment of time spent with Vivek Ramaswamy. Shoot, it wasn’t till almost 70 minutes in that anybody noticed Bobby Jindal had somehow snuck onstage and offered an immigration plan.
Republican donors apparently found this display of grating futility so discouraging, they’re once again indulging in fantasies of Glenn Youngkin appearing on the horizon, leading a cavalry charge that magically delivers the GOP from a decade of cowardice and shitty choices. Great plan, you guys. I bet it works.
Maybe they should draft Jennifer Petersen, the stay-at-home mom who devotes her ample free time to reading books (yay!) so she can ban them, (boo!) unless maybe Kim Davis is available?
Recently convicted Trumpworld dingleberry Peter Navarro bemoaned the treacherous “pimp ladies” assailing poor, put-upon feminist icon Donald J. Trump, (the “J” stands for “Just lost in court to E. Jean Carroll again) suggesting as a solution hanging a great big No Girls Allowed sign on the door in the Reich to come.
Scott Hall became the first co-defendant in the Georgia election interference case to take a plea deal, yet another legal setback for the career crook who had to renegotiate his prenup because his wife was worried the lawyers’d wind up with everything.
Incidentally, while I was drafting tonight’s post, Tangerine Idi Amin gave an extra-fashy speech in California, complete with calls for extrajudicial violence, and a Paul Pelosi joke, both big hits with the assembled wingnut donors. No wonder Republican voters see him as “a person of faith.”
In contrast, Joe Biden somehow managed to get through the whole week without celebrating one single act of political violence, instead joining striking auto workers on the picket line, and delivering another stem-winder on the general awesomeness of democracy. Oddly, Fox seems mostly interested in covering his dog.
Okay, I’m gonna grab a beer and watch the government shut down. Until next week, you stay safe out there, friend…
Friday, September 29th, 2023
https://showercapblog.com/he-shall-be-known-h...eadership/
Remember, this is the Republican Party when they’ve had plenty of time to prepare. A presidential primary debate. The impeachment hearing they’ve dreamt of since Biden first whooped their boy’s ass. As we gather here to gape at ineptitude that simply should not be possible at this rung on the evolutionary ladder, never forget…they are sending their very, very best.
Our expectations of Speaker McCarthy have crumbled to the point where it qualifies as breaking news whenever he manages to navigate a basic procedural vote without lighting his own scrotum on fire. Seriously, I got a CNN push notification this morning: “Holy crud, took him a week, but the little dweeb actually managed to open debate on his doomed continuing resolution!”
I suppose it’s marginally more impressive when you note he pulled it off with Matt Gaetz nipping at his heels, (and you’ll want to get any bites checked out by a medical professional right away, Kev) gleefully plotting his overthrow.
Anyway, Kevin was permitted scarcely a moment to bask in the triumphal push notification glow before twenty-one members of his feral caucus torpedoed the CR, sending Gaetz once more a-braying before the assembled cameras.
However, anticipating failure, McCarthy had previously dispatched Jims Comer and Jordan on a last minute mission to make the American public believe their government is so gobsmackingly fucking stupid that none of us will ever be safe until it’s shut down forever. And if they didn’t quite pull it off, well, it wasn’t for want of trying.
https://newrepublic.com/article/175870/comer-...nt-hearing
It’s baffling that anyone anywhere expects success from these clowns at this point, isn’t it? We’ve been watching James Comer drop bowling ball after bowling ball on his own groin, from increasingly great heights, since January. Who on Earth imagined this overmatched clod could pull an impeachment inquiry off?
https://www.nbcnews.com/politics/congress/hou...rcna117657
Honestly, whether you were amused or appalled that he called witnesses who testified that there’s no evidence supporting impeachment, you certainly weren’t surprised. Of course, no one expected Jimmy to clear the “impossibly high bar” of actually proving his asinine claims.
Indeed, after numerous traumatic collisions with reality, the would-be impeachers retreated to their alternate reality safe space on Hannity, where there are no pesky journalists or former Ukrainian Presidents to debunk their bullshit.
https://www.mediamatters.org/fox-news/after-d...at-hannity
Coming to theatres this Xmas, from the director of My Son Hunter: DEAD GRIFT WALKING, the heart-rending tale of one con man’s family business receiving the “corporate death penalty” following years of brazen, unrepentant fraud. Starring Sean Penn as the Trump Organization, and Louise Linton, who’s garnering Oscar buzz as some sort of hot, evil nun.
Hey, speaking of the death penalty, the 45th President of the United States and current Republican frontrunner celebrated Mark Milley’s retirement by publicly calling for the outgoing Chairman of the Joint Chiefs’ execution, part of his election season ratcheting-up of the ol’ stochastic terror apparatus.
(Maybe that’s what the Glock was for, but alas, the indicted are prohibited from purchasing murder machines, so the Dotard narrowly avoided a 92nd charge there. Ah well, he wouldn’t have been able to fire it anyway, with those stunted, ineffectual phalanges.)
Equally executable (with an emphasis on CUTE) are pop diva Taylor Swift and her rumored new beau, extra-fancy football man Travis Kelce, who earned Cult45’s wrath by virtue of being successful, and vaccinated. Oh, and I guess Travis has done Bud Light commercials, so he’s just perfect for the Two Minutes Hate.
https://slate.com/culture/2023/09/taylor-swif...-news.html
Now Th’Federalist says Swift’s music is responsible for the downfall of western civilization, granting hip hop and unwed mothers a welcome respite. Various creeps n’ incels proclaimed her “homely” and a “gold digger.” And yes, Stew Peters would like to see the happy couple put to death. It’s all very healthy and normal.
For reasons that’re far from clear, Nikki Haley and the However Many Dwarves gathered at the Ronald Reagan Memorial Wiffle Ball Field to bicker over who gets to give the last concession speech in the humiliatingly-not-even-about-the-veep-slot-anymore “Republican primary.”
Tim Scott suggested “Johnson’s Great Society” was harder for Black families to survive than slavery, which I’ll grant was expertly targeted pandering, and if he can figure out how to get over the more, ahem, obvious hurdles in his path, Tim might just have a future in this white nationalist resentment cult.
Beyond that, outside of some controversy over an alleged epidemic of teachers fornicating, the evening primarily involved the purgatorial torment of time spent with Vivek Ramaswamy. Shoot, it wasn’t till almost 70 minutes in that anybody noticed Bobby Jindal had somehow snuck onstage and offered an immigration plan.
Republican donors apparently found this display of grating futility so discouraging, they’re once again indulging in fantasies of Glenn Youngkin appearing on the horizon, leading a cavalry charge that magically delivers the GOP from a decade of cowardice and shitty choices. Great plan, you guys. I bet it works.
Maybe they should draft Jennifer Petersen, the stay-at-home mom who devotes her ample free time to reading books (yay!) so she can ban them, (boo!) unless maybe Kim Davis is available?
Recently convicted Trumpworld dingleberry Peter Navarro bemoaned the treacherous “pimp ladies” assailing poor, put-upon feminist icon Donald J. Trump, (the “J” stands for “Just lost in court to E. Jean Carroll again) suggesting as a solution hanging a great big No Girls Allowed sign on the door in the Reich to come.
Scott Hall became the first co-defendant in the Georgia election interference case to take a plea deal, yet another legal setback for the career crook who had to renegotiate his prenup because his wife was worried the lawyers’d wind up with everything.
Incidentally, while I was drafting tonight’s post, Tangerine Idi Amin gave an extra-fashy speech in California, complete with calls for extrajudicial violence, and a Paul Pelosi joke, both big hits with the assembled wingnut donors. No wonder Republican voters see him as “a person of faith.”
In contrast, Joe Biden somehow managed to get through the whole week without celebrating one single act of political violence, instead joining striking auto workers on the picket line, and delivering another stem-winder on the general awesomeness of democracy. Oddly, Fox seems mostly interested in covering his dog.
Okay, I’m gonna grab a beer and watch the government shut down. Until next week, you stay safe out there, friend…
