Perhaps some satire will help Unskilled Florida
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Posted On: 07/24/2023 8:30:13 PM
Perhaps some satire will help
Unskilled Florida Man Regrets Missing Out on Being Enslaved
By Andy Borowitz
July 24, 2023
Ron DeSantis
TALLAHASSEE (The Borowitz Report)—An unskilled Florida man said that he deeply regrets having missed out on the opportunity to be a slave.
The man said that his “lack of access to enslavement” had made his acquisition of essential skills “impossible.”
“Every day when I mess something up at work, I wonder to myself, would I be doing a better job if I’d been a slave?” he said. “There’s no question that it would have been a game-changer for me.”
He argued that being barred from forced servitude was a form of “white underprivilege,” and that Caucasians who suffer from a resulting skills deficit deserve reparations.
“Something must be done to compensate people like me who were unfairly denied the chance to be slaves,” he said. “When I think about the personal benefits I was prevented from obtaining, it makes me furious.”
https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-repo...g-enslaved?
Unskilled Florida Man Regrets Missing Out on Being Enslaved
By Andy Borowitz
July 24, 2023
Ron DeSantis
TALLAHASSEE (The Borowitz Report)—An unskilled Florida man said that he deeply regrets having missed out on the opportunity to be a slave.
The man said that his “lack of access to enslavement” had made his acquisition of essential skills “impossible.”
“Every day when I mess something up at work, I wonder to myself, would I be doing a better job if I’d been a slave?” he said. “There’s no question that it would have been a game-changer for me.”
He argued that being barred from forced servitude was a form of “white underprivilege,” and that Caucasians who suffer from a resulting skills deficit deserve reparations.
“Something must be done to compensate people like me who were unfairly denied the chance to be slaves,” he said. “When I think about the personal benefits I was prevented from obtaining, it makes me furious.”
https://www.newyorker.com/humor/borowitz-repo...g-enslaved?
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