I’m starting a flight company exclusively for b
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bald people. It’s called....
Receding Airlines.
I just scored a 170 on an online IQ test and
only had to answer three simple questions:
1. My credit card number.
2. My social security number.
3. Upload a signed copy of my birth certificate.
My balloon elephant wouldn’t fit on the back seat of the car.
So I had to pop the trunk.
My windshield was covered in ice this morning and I didn’t have a proper scraper to remove it so I used my store discount card.
But I only got 20% off.
One morning over breakfast, a guy was complaining to his wife. “I’ve been with the circus for over 25 years, and every performance I follow behind the elephants and clean up their poop. Twenty-five years, ‘Scoop the poop! Scoop the poop!’ I’m tired of it.”
His wife calmly said, “If you’re so unhappy, why don’t you quit?”
“What! And leave show business?!”
Why are the great pyramids in Egypt?
Because they were too heavy to carry off to the British museum.