The Best Career Advice I Ever Heard: 'Dream Big,' 'Don't Fret About Things You Can't Change' And 18 Other Gems

A crowdsourced question to a LinkedIn group recently spurred an outpouring of inspiration and practical strategies.

Sonia Gray , new to the job as associate director of business development at Net@Work in Portland , OR, started the conversation on June 2 with a query to the 18,000+ members of the Connect: Professional Women’s Network . “Finish this sentence: The best advice I ever received was. . .” she wrote.

To prime the pump, she candidly shared a lesson from a former boss: “During an especially trying time, he said something to me that gave me startling insight into why I’m challenged by certain things,” Gray wrote. “He said, ‘Sonia, once you stop looking for ways to be offended, there’ll be no stopping you.’”

Group members quickly added their voices to the conversation and within 10 days there were nearly 300 responses from women all over the country in many different occupations. Most of the advice they offered is equally helpful to men, and applies whether you are an entrepreneur or an employee. Here are some of the gems.

Lisa McMurtrie , educational consultant/tutor (Baltimore, MD ):

1. “People break down into two groups, motors and anchors. You always want to surround yourself by people who push you forward, not hold you down.”

Amy Less , recruiting manager, Jupiter Medical Center ( West Palm Beach , Fla.) :

2. “There are things in life that you can’t control. . .so don’t waste your time, energy or sanity on them. You can only control your reaction to them. . .so make your reaction worthy, smart and sane.”

Gala DeJong , administrative coordinator, ASI | Signage Innovations ( Des Moines, Iowa ) :

3. “You have to work with your co-workers but you do not have to be best friends.”

Sherlynn Lauture Vernon , independent marketing representative (Tampa, Fla.):

4. “If you don’t build YOUR dream, someone will hire you to build THEIRS!”

Rosita Weller ,  training and personal development manager (Corwen, Denbighshire, United Kingdom):

5. ” I was about to venture out of my comfort zone. I was offered a position as training officer in the company I worked for. I felt daunted by the offer. I doubted whether I could do this as I was not a good communicator and did not feel comfortable speaking with strangers. My husband’s advice to me was, ‘Just be your nutty self.’ I took him literally, and my confidence grew with each training session.”

Mary Barnes , vice president, business and operation, Userplane ( Washington , D.C.):

6. “When I took on my first management role someone told me I would go through three phases: the honeymoon period, the test and how it’s actually going to be. I have kept that advice in mind over the years. It has helped frame many transition periods for me.”

Danielle Leone , administrative dispatch assistant, Publix (Sarasota, Fla.):

7. “You have two eyes, two ears, and one mouth. Observe and listen twice before speaking once.”

Lisa Selip , vice president of marketing, licensing and business development, Mighty Kids Media (Charlotte, N.C.):

8. “Before you put somebody in their place, put yourself in their place.”

Jennifer Jones , opera singer (Phoenix):

9. “‘If you want something you have never had, you must be willing to do something you have never done.’ I do not have an author to credit this saying to but the person who wrote this has influenced my life in many wonderful ways.”

Kathy Simmers , executive, So Worth It (Raleigh-Durham, NC):

10. “I was promised a raise at my job if certain things happened. They happened, the raise didn’t. I walked out and I wasn’t sure if I was going back. A friend said to me, ‘Don’t let their lack of integrity choose the timing for you to leave. Choose your time, make your plan.’ I went back, put my plan in place. A few months later when the time was right, I left and started my own firm. It was just the advice I needed at the time. I have been successfully self-employed ever since.”

Elizabeth Kimmelman Schwartz , associate director, alumnae engagement, Bryn Mawr College (Bryn Mawr, PA) :

11. “‘Don’t live on all of your salary, put a set amount aside automatically every month so you build up savings and know you can live on less. This will give you freedom to pursue what you want.’ A partner at a very prestigious corporate law firm told me that when I was a summer associate. I took it to heart and that philosophy is what allowed me to finally leave big law and work in higher education, despite the drastic pay cut. I’m now happy and very fulfilled – and I still live on less than what I bring home!”

Sheila Frances , publisher/author, FranJeff Publishing (Delray Beach, Fla.):

12. “I am the only one who places limitations on what I can do or on what I can become. Reach for the moon and you will catch a STAR! Never stop climbing!”

Molly K. McPherson , masters candidate, international trade and investment policy (Washington, D.C.):

13. “Carefully phrased questions can help move a discussion along and resolve a conflict better than the best-made point. . . This has helped me immensely in developing relationships with difficult executives who were not interested in hearing my (or anyone else’s) opinion.”

Lisa Sayers , self-employed entrepreneur (Erie, PA):

14. “It’s not who we are that keeps us from where we want to be–it’s who we THINK we are.”

Lori Koopmann , vice president, finance, Barcom Electronics (St. Louis, MO):

15. “From a very wise man who taught me a lot about business and people in general: ‘If you take care of the customer, the money will come. If you chase the money, the customer will run.’”

Nancy Miller , professor of marketing (Atlanta, GA):

16. “From Ms. Frizzle [the teacher in The Magic School Bus books], ‘Take chances, make mistakes, get messy.’”

Kimberly McHale , director, marketing communications, Coastal Medical Management (Providence, R.I.):

17. “Smile openly at every person you see! It can literally change not only their day, but yours as well.”

Carrie Krier , recruiting manager, Wells Fargo (Des Moines, Iowa):

18. “A former bank president wisely advised, ‘Don’t look back, we’re not going that way!’”

Eileen Becker , lawyer, Loughlin FitzGerald (New York) :

19. “The piece of advice I tend to fall back on quite often is a quote from Eleanor Roosevelt that I have posted on my office wall: ‘You must do the thing you think you cannot do.’”

Sherry Nouraini , consultant, Comprendia (San Diego, Calif.):

20. “Don’t be the best kept secret!”

No chance of that in Gray’s case. By asking a great question, being a good listener, and moderating the conversation (all in the spirit of No. 13, above), she dramatically expanded her network.

http://www.forbes.com/sites/deborahljacobs/20...ther-gems/