I can see it now: "CytoDyn Cures Cancer" Can
Post# of 148294
"CytoDyn Cures Cancer"
Cancer advocacy groups take to Twitter to lambast company who has finally, after decades of failures and hundreds of billions spent, cured cancer.
"We never thought this day would come," said one dazed cancer supporter, a solitary tear dropping on to their "Have You Hugged a Tumor Today?" tee.. "Sure everyone talks about curing cancer, but it always fails phase 3."
Another added "This is going to be horrible for the planet. And my only hope for an early check out for my mother in law just got wrecked.. I don't know if I can take another two decades of her."
A third, shouting and hysterical, chimed in: "It used to be a badge of honor to survive cancer, now this [expletive] company is taking that away from us?? Who the [expletive] do they think they are?? What are we going to do for GoFundMe drives now???"
On wall street, there was generally a sentiment of resentment.. "This is a cure that literally nobody asked for. I don't know of anyone in the industry that's happy about hundreds of millions of dollars being saved every year on 'research' and medical care. This is going to wreck entire industries."
One particularly gnomish character was seen canvassing cancer wards, trying to tell patients to use Truvada, a questionably effective and potentially harmful treatment, and not take "the easy way out"... "I think if you ask any of these patients, they'll tell you that they aren't interested in any 'Quick Fixes' here, they want a treatment that they can believe helps, something.. True. Truevada. True Va Daaa.. that's a great name, isn't it? When you get cancer, do you want something that sounds like a lab experiment gone wrong or True old TruveyduveyDaDa? I know what I want!"
As we turned to go, he hastily added "Follow me on Twitter!"