Marjorie Taylor Greene Week Leaves Me Longing For
Post# of 122212
Friday, January 29th, 2021
by Shower Cap | American Madness Journal | 1 comment
In many ways, this was Marjorie Taylor Greene Week, because it seemed like you couldn’t refresh your feed without discovering some shocking new depth to that loon’s seemingly limitless reservoir of awful behavior.
The Vainglorious MTG is a slur-spewing, school-shooting-survivor-harassing wonder of science: with the intellectual capacity of Tommy Tuberville, the casual bigotry of Steve King, and her own unique strain of whatever fungus has been chewing on Alex Jones’ brain, she’s some sort of hideously sewn-together hybrid Republican, and she clearly misinterpreted the old Jews in Space bit as a rather ominous threat.
https://globalnews.ca/news/7607501/marjorie-t...ace-laser/
Congratulations, Minority Leader McCarthy: this insane Nazi lady is the face of your caucus. Oh. Excuse me, sir, I didn’t mean to disturb you…I just figured since Pumpkin Spice Pol Pot fled Washington in defeat and disgrace, there would no longer be any need for you to orally polish his hemorrhoids, let alone fly all the way to Florida for the opportunity, but…I suppose after four years, you must get to like it down there. Apparently.
See, that’s why it’s REALLY Marjorie Taylor Greene Week, because the institutional Republican Party has gazed upon the roaring-blaze-in-the-dumpster-behind-Mengele’s-place their party has become, and decided, “we should probably put that fire out, sure, but look at how prettily it burns!”
http://showercapblog.com/marjorie-taylor-gree...ompetence/
Sure, you lost both houses of Congress and the White House, and transformed into an authentic 21st century American Nazi in the process, but remember that summer you spent chanting “lock her up” alongside your fellow rage-warped white mediocrities? It was like Grease, only with less singing and also everybody was a racist loser.
So instead of letting the fever break, the Texas state Republican Party incorporated a QAnon slogan into their official branding.
The Hawaiian sub-sect of Cult45 elevated a “comicsgate” creep to the position of vice chairman, only to be caught off guard somehow when he used official party social media accounts to pimp Q trash.
In Arizona, Kelli Ward’s band of turd-gargling maniacs censured Cindy McCain, Jeff Flake, and Governor Doug Ducey for the high crime of refusing to help overthrow the United States government for a totalitarian game show host.
Unwilling to be out-crazied, the Oregon GOP proclaimed, via barely-legible feces smears on their meth dealer’s living room wall, that the Capitol riot was a “false flag” operation, designed to make Hairplug Himmler and his Legion of Losers look bad, as though any assistance is required on that particular front.
I suppose it shouldn’t surprise anyone that a party/cult/malodorous wad of freaks so devoted to enshrining bullshit as gospel would also require a few false idols to worship, and Tom Cotton and Madison Cawthorn certainly haven’t been shy about stealing whatever valor is necessary to hoover up the slavering throng’s deranged adulation.
Marm-a-Lago is reportedly hemorrhaging members, by the way, because I guess the atmosphere around a toppled tyrant isn’t exactly festive. Yeah, I’m told Eva Braun’s attempts to spruce up the ol’ bunker ultimately went unappreciated, too.
Ted Cruz naturally wants to change the subject from the bloodthirsty white supremacist mob he incited, so he instigated a “Twitter feud” with affable film personality Seth Rogen, sliding effortlessly from agitating for the violent overthrow of the federal government to the mewling victimhood that defines his increasingly embarrassing “brand.”
Like, we know Ted aspires to higher office, but seriously, what is his plan to make the public forget that he is literally the most pathetic, bottom-feeding weasel in American politics? Hypnotism?
Look out, Arkansas, Sarah Huckleberry Slanders is back, and she’s bringing her dimestore autocrat incompetence to YOUR Governor’s Mansion!
So, Rudy Giuliani is apparently getting sued for not only every dime he’s worth, but everything he possesses of any value, down to those precious memories of backseat incest from his bygone youth, back when he could scarcely dream he’d someday wind up as the single slimiest colon polyp in a cancerous fascist invasion of American democracy.
Since the American right refuses to self-regulate, I feel like these Dominion lawsuits might be our best shot at seeing actual consequences for the, y’know, the months-long disinformation campaign that culminated in an armed coup attempt.
I’m not saying it’s a good system, I’m saying I want to see Rudy squeezed like a zit, and I’m willing to subscribe to any streaming service that can deliver that shit.
Mitch McConnell finally consented to allow Democrats to run the Senate they won, though I’m sure he still follows the new Majority Leader around all day like a lost puppy, threatening to filibuster Schumer’s second slice of pie or some shit.
The state of Oklahoma is, hilariously, attempting to return the hydroxychloroquine stockpile they foolishly dropped a couple million bucks on last year.
There should be punishment for buying two million dollars’ worth of hydroxychloroquine on Donald Trump’s advice, if only that you’re stuck with two million dollars’ worth of hydroxychloroquine instead of two million dollars.
I’m told the Oklahoma attorney general is also kicking himself for throwing out the receipt for those sixty thousand bottles of bleach he bought from Target.
![Like This Post](/images/thumb-up.png)
![Dislike This Post](/images/thumb-down.png)