My podiatrist examined me and started writing bus
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busily on his clipboard. I said, "What are you doing?"
He said, "I'm just making some footnotes."
Dropped a pointy Xmas ornament on my
foot while decorating the tree last night.
Hurt like the Dickens.
A guy is in bed with a great looking blonde.
The girl asks, “You haven’t got AIDS have you?”
He replies, “No.”
She responds, “Oh, thank heavens for that!! I don’t want to get that again!”
Abe is in a terrible state and goes to see
Dr Myers, his psychiatrist.
“Doctor, I need your help in a big way. I feel very suicidal. What should I do?”
Doctor Myers replies, “You must pay me in advance.”