Trump Says He Deserves No Blame for State of Ameri
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By Andy Borowitz
September 1, 2020
President Donald Trump golfing.
WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—Pushing back against attempts to brand the United States of 2020 as “Trump’s America,” Donald Trump said that he deserves no blame for the state of the country, because he has not actually done any work for the past four years.
“I could understand people blaming me for things if I had actually been doing my job, but, quite frankly, I haven’t,” he said. “Anybody who claims otherwise is a terrible person.”
“CNN, which is a disgrace, says that it’s the White House’s fault for this and the White House’s fault for that,” he added. “Well, I’ve hardly been at the White House, so, once again, they’re wrong.”
Attempting to answer the question of whose America it is, if not his, Trump said, “The last President who actually worked at the White House was Barack Obama. So if this is anybody’s America it’s his and Sleepy Joe’s. People are saying that. They’re sick of living in Biden’s America, and we cannot give Joe Biden another four years.”
He rejected any suggestion that, as President, he must own the current conditions in America, asserting, “I know what I own and what I don’t own. I own Bill Barr. I own Mitch McConnell. I don’t own America.”