Funny Monday Jokes, Quotes And

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Funny Monday Jokes, Quotes And Status

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How is today Monday? It was Friday only a few hours ago…
You know its Monday when your left eye wont open and your right eye is twitching.
Just remember, every day is a gift from God. Well except for Monday.. Satan slips that one in. He’s a sneaky bastard.
If Monday was a movie, it would be very long and boring.
I like Tuesday simply because it is literally the furthest from next Monday I can possibly be.
Keep calm and pretend today isn’t Monday.
Why are you all so excited it’s Friday? Monday will be here in 5 minutes.
I think Mondays were invented to punish us for all the fun we have on the weekends!
Monday Morning……Rolling out of bed is easy. Getting up off the floor is another story.
If Monday had a face, I would punch it.
A rainy Friday is still better than a sunny Monday…
If everyday is a gift, I want to know where I can return Mondays.
Judging from all the misery and carnage on my newsfeed, I’m assuming it’s Monday.
The 7 days of my week…..Monday, Monday, Monday, Monday, Friday, Saturday and preMonday
Monday morning coffee is just as important as Friday night liquor….almost.
I can see smoke on the horizon. God I hope it’s rest of Monday burning to the ground
Thank God It’s Monday” ~ My Liver
I can already hear Monday morning whispering Go F***Yourself in my ear.
I’ve been keeping this a secret for almost a year now because I didn’t want to lose friends: I don’t work on Mondays.
Practicing my “Eye Rolling” cause you know… tomorrow’s Monday.
I like Tuesday simply because it is literally the furthest from next Monday I can possibly be.
My greatest fear on Monday is greeting someone and asking someone how their weekend went and they actually telling me every mundane details about it.
MONDAY Y U NO FUN FUN FUN LIKE FRIDAY?
Breaking News: Tuesdays suck just as much as Mondays.
I’m not saying she’s a slut, but she’s been banged more than a snooze button on Monday morning.
The only thing worse than Friday the 13th, is Monday the 13th
My greatest fear on Monday is greeting someone and asking someone how their weekend went and they actually telling me every mundane details about it.
“Today its Sunday” Forward this to 15 friends,.. within 7 days you”ll get another Sunday. it really works… One of my friends ignored it and he got Monday within 24 hours
I can always tell how good my weekend was by how many pictures I have to untag on Monday.
I really need a day in-between Sunday & Monday
Things I Hate: slow internet connection and monday, tuesday, wednesday, thursday and half of friday.
I have a bad case of the Mondays only it’s everyday and it’s called existence.
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