A Frenchman, an Englishman, and a New Yorker are c
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The chief cannibal comes to them and says, "The bad news is that now that we've caught you, we're going to kill you, put you in a pot, cook you, eat you, and then use your skins to build a canoe. The good news is that you get to choose how you die."
The Frenchman says, "I take zee sword."
The chief gives him a sword, he says, "Vive la France!" and runs himself through.
The Englishman says, "Right--a pistol for me, please."
The chief gives him a pistol, he points it at himself, says, "God save the queen!" and shoots.
The New Yorker says, "Gimme a fork."
The chief is puzzled, but he shrugs and gives him a fork. The New Yorker takes the fork and starts jabbing himself all over the stomach, the sides, the chest, everywhere. There's blood gushing out all over; it's horrible!
The chief is appalled, and asks, "What in the world are you doing?"
The New Yorker says, "So much for your stupid canoe!"