1. My goal for 2018 was to lose 10 pounds. Only 15
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Posted On: 01/12/2018 7:15:12 PM
1. My goal for 2018 was to lose 10 pounds. Only 15 to go.
2. Ate salad for dinner. Mostly croutons & tomatoes. Really just one
big round crouton covered with tomato sauce. And cheese. FINE, it was
a pizza. I ate a pizza.
3. How to prepare Tofu:
a. Throw it in the trash
b. Grill some meat
4. I just did a week's worth of cardio after walking into a spider web.
5. I don't mean to brag, but I finished my 14-day diet food in 3 hours
and 20 minutes.
6. A recent study has found women who carry a little extra weight live
longer than men who mention it.
7. Kids today don't know how easy they have it. When I was young, I
had to walk 9 feet through shag carpet to change the TV channel.
8. Senility has been a smooth transition for me..
9. Remember back when we were kids and every time it was below zero
outside they closed school? Nah, me either.
10. I may not be that funny or athletic or good looking or smart or
talented. I forgot where I was going with this.
11. I love being over 70. I learn something new every day and forget 5 others.
12. A thief broke into my house last night. He started searching for
money so I woke up and searched with him.
13. I think I'll just put an "Out of Order" sticker on my forehead and
call it a day.
14. November 6, 2017 was the end of Daylight Savings Time. Hope you
didn't forget to set your bathroom scale back 10 pounds on Saturday
night. HECK, 10 LBS., I SET IT BACK 50 LBS.
15. And finally, always try to remember that once you're over the hill
you begin to pick up speed.
2. Ate salad for dinner. Mostly croutons & tomatoes. Really just one
big round crouton covered with tomato sauce. And cheese. FINE, it was
a pizza. I ate a pizza.
3. How to prepare Tofu:
a. Throw it in the trash
b. Grill some meat
4. I just did a week's worth of cardio after walking into a spider web.
5. I don't mean to brag, but I finished my 14-day diet food in 3 hours
and 20 minutes.
6. A recent study has found women who carry a little extra weight live
longer than men who mention it.
7. Kids today don't know how easy they have it. When I was young, I
had to walk 9 feet through shag carpet to change the TV channel.
8. Senility has been a smooth transition for me..
9. Remember back when we were kids and every time it was below zero
outside they closed school? Nah, me either.
10. I may not be that funny or athletic or good looking or smart or
talented. I forgot where I was going with this.
11. I love being over 70. I learn something new every day and forget 5 others.
12. A thief broke into my house last night. He started searching for
money so I woke up and searched with him.
13. I think I'll just put an "Out of Order" sticker on my forehead and
call it a day.
14. November 6, 2017 was the end of Daylight Savings Time. Hope you
didn't forget to set your bathroom scale back 10 pounds on Saturday
night. HECK, 10 LBS., I SET IT BACK 50 LBS.
15. And finally, always try to remember that once you're over the hill
you begin to pick up speed.
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