So says the keyboard commando who still hasn't got

So says the keyboard commando who still hasn't gotten over getting slammed against his locker and forced to give up his lunch money, which further stunted your growth, increased your absences, and perpetuated a vicious cycle leaving you the sawed-off whining little under-educated biatch you are.

As well constructed and punctuated as the paragraph was, YOU will need to read it again for the best chance at comprehension that you're capable of.

LMAO!