I am really having a hard time not offering to buy

I am really having a hard time not offering to buy rulers for the weenie-waggers over on the other board, who keep trying to one-up each other about what great traders they are. If they'd just measure 'em they could settle the question of who has the biggest pee-pee once and for all.

Of course, I haven't seen a whole lot of 3-inch rulers for sale, so I guess I better not make the offer till I find some.