I always take my wife's
side no matter what. She's fat
I always take my wife's
side no matter what. She's fat enough without eating KFC potatoes and gravy too.
CNN survey: Eight out of ten men have watched porn online. The other two were too busy to answer.
According to the Guitar Hero
loading screen, "You can look even cooler by using the slider bar." As if you don't look cool enough already.
I got in the car with my
drug dealer the other day. He drove around slowly for a while, before picking up speed.
I found a rock yesterday
that measured 1,760 yards in length. Must be some kind of milestone.
My wife was complaining that nobody ever phoned her, so I put a "How's my driving?" sticker on her car. The phone hasn't stopped ringing since.
Some helium floats into a bar and tries to order a drink. The bartender says, "We don't serve noble gases in here." The helium doesn't react.
My wife had her period,
and all I got was this bloody T-shirt.
A midget with a speech impediment goes to buy a horse at a ranch and the rancher asks him if he's looking for a male or female horse.
"A female horth."
He shows him a prized filly.
"Nith lookin horth. Can I thee her eyeth?"
The rancher picks up the midget and he gives the horse's eyes the once over.
"Nith eyeth, can I thee her earzth?"
He picks the little fella up again, and shows him the horse's ears.
"Nith earzth, can I see her mouf?"
The rancher is gettin' pretty ticked off by this point, but he picks
him up again and shows him the horse's mouth.
"Nice mouf, can I see her twat?"
Totally mad as hell at this point, the rancher grabs him under his
arms and rams the midget's head as far as he can up the horse's twat, pulls him out and slams him on the ground.
The midget gets up, sputtering and coughing.
"Perhapth I thould rephrathe that; Can I thee her wun awound a widdle bit"?
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