Brunos are from Mars, Freddies are from Mercury.
Post# of 3036
Posted On: 05/02/2014 9:25:37 PM
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Brunos are from Mars, Freddies are from Mercury.
One day on Mercury lasts about 1,408 hours. About the same as a Monday on Earth.
Apparently, women only enjoy a nice romantic
breakfast in bed when they know how you got in their house.
If Jehovah's witnesses brought red wine and
Pringles with them, I'd gladly let them in to spend an afternoon chatting about religion.
Seems like you must have been preeeetty stupid
to get caught for murder in the 1800's.
They say if you choose a job you love,
you'll never work a day in your life.
I have to work tomorrow.
Sent an email to my Mom.
Now I'm at her place showing her how to open it.
That awkward moment when you
leave a store without buying anything and all you can think is "act natural, you're innocent"
Every time I go into my boss' office she tells me "take a seat".
I have 14 now.
If I had known what cleaning a toilet is like with a husband and two sons I would've become a lesbian.
I feel like all bears are Bad News Bears.
I've never seen a bear and was like "Oh, he looks like he has good news for us, lets stick around."
I bet chickens have mixed emotions about
Thanksgiving, because they're safe for a day, but why aren't they good enough for a holiday meal?
I get out of awkward dinner party conversations
by telling people it's my first outing since the psychiatrist declared me unfit to stand trial.
The last guy who broke my heart was
hard to get over.
At least until I shifted the truck into four-wheel drive.
One day on Mercury lasts about 1,408 hours. About the same as a Monday on Earth.
Apparently, women only enjoy a nice romantic
breakfast in bed when they know how you got in their house.
If Jehovah's witnesses brought red wine and
Pringles with them, I'd gladly let them in to spend an afternoon chatting about religion.
Seems like you must have been preeeetty stupid
to get caught for murder in the 1800's.
They say if you choose a job you love,
you'll never work a day in your life.
I have to work tomorrow.
Sent an email to my Mom.
Now I'm at her place showing her how to open it.
That awkward moment when you
leave a store without buying anything and all you can think is "act natural, you're innocent"
Every time I go into my boss' office she tells me "take a seat".
I have 14 now.
If I had known what cleaning a toilet is like with a husband and two sons I would've become a lesbian.
I feel like all bears are Bad News Bears.
I've never seen a bear and was like "Oh, he looks like he has good news for us, lets stick around."
I bet chickens have mixed emotions about
Thanksgiving, because they're safe for a day, but why aren't they good enough for a holiday meal?
I get out of awkward dinner party conversations
by telling people it's my first outing since the psychiatrist declared me unfit to stand trial.
The last guy who broke my heart was
hard to get over.
At least until I shifted the truck into four-wheel drive.
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