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Only in the movies will you see: There is always

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Post# of 3036
Posted On: 04/14/2014 7:40:19 PM
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Posted By: acc724
Only in the movies will you see:
There is always a gun in reach when you fall onto the ground.

When the hero is running and the bad guys are shooting at him with a machine gun, the bullets will consistently hit the ground just behind his feet. This is because it's impossible to swivel a machine gun as quickly as the hero is running.

In car chases the hero car just avoids the woman pushing the baby stroller across the road. Then it crashes through lots of market stalls (usually fruit and vegetable stalls), destroying the livelihoods of perfectly innocent hard-working people but never actually killing any of them.

A scrapbook, containing all the villain's crimes and killings, is always stumbled across by the hero, typically under a bare lightbulb in the killer's basement.

When the lead detective has a meeting with his team, it is always productive and completed in seconds or minutes. Every one contributes vital pieces of information and the conversation flows flawlessly with everyone possessing super intelligence and quick thinking abilities.

Passengers always exit the taxicab and then pay the driver through his window.

Just as the hero and villains fight ends, with the hero winning, about a dozen police cars show up.

When about to have sex, clothes melt seamlessly off bodies. No one ever needs to sit down and take off shoes and socks.

Whenever anyone receives a phone call in the middle of the night, it's always 2, 3 or 4am. Exactly.
Getaway cars never start first time. But all cop cars do. (They will also slide to a dramatic stop in the midst of a crime scene).

If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any strange noises wearing their most revealing underwear.

On a police stake-out, the action will only ever take place when food is being consumed and scalding hot coffees are perched precariously on the dashboard.

All grocery shopping involves the purchase of French loaves which will be placed in open brown paper bags.

Cars never need fuel (unless they are involved in a pursuit).

If a microphone is turned on it will immediately feedback.

Cars will explode instantly when struck by a single bullet.

If being chased through a city you can usually take cover in a passing parade.

The ventilation system of any building is the perfect hiding place. Nobody will ever think of looking for you in there and you can travel to any other part of the building undetected.

Prostitutes always look like Julia Roberts or Jamie Lee Curtis. They have expensive clothes and nice apartments but no pimps. They are friendly with the shopkeepers in their neighbourhood who do not mind at all what the girl does for a living.

A single match is usually sufficient to light up a room the size of a football stadium.



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