Blonde Men Jokes  A friend told the blond man: "

Blonde Men Jokes 
> A friend told the blond man: "Christmas is on a Friday this year." 
> The blond man then said, "Let's hope it's not the 13th." 
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> Two blond men find three grenades, and they decide to take them to a police station. 
> One asked: "What if one explodes before we get there?" 
> The other says: "We'll lie and say we only found two." 
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> 
> A woman phoned her blonde neighbor man and said: 
> "Close your curtains the next time you & your wife are in the bedroom. 
> The whole street was watching and laughing at you yesterday." 
> To which the blonde man replied: "Well the joke's on all of you because 
> I wasn't even at home yesterday." 
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> 
> A blonde man is in the bathroom and his wife shouts: "Did you find the shampoo?" 
> He answers, "Yes, but I'm not sure what to do... it's for dry hair, and I've just wet mine." 
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> A blonde man goes to the vet with his goldfish. 
> "I think it's got epilepsy," he tells the vet. 
> The vet takes a look and says, "It seems calm enough to me". 
> The blonde man says, "Wait, I haven't taken it out of the bowl yet". 
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> A blond man spies a letter lying on his doormat. 
> It says on the envelope "DO NOT BEND ". 
> He spends the next 2 hours trying to figure out how to pick it up. 
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> A blond man shouts frantically into the phone 
> "My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart!" 
> "Is this her first child?" asks the Doctor. 
> "No", he shouts, "this is her husband!" 
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> A blonde man was driving home, drunk as a skunk. 
> Suddenly he has to swerve to avoid a tree, then another, then another. 
> A cop car pulls him over, so he tells the cop about all the trees in the road. 
> The cop says, "That's your air freshener swinging about!" 
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> A blonde man's dog goes missing and he is frantic. 
> His wife says "Why don't you put an ad in the paper?" 
> He does, but two weeks later the dog is still missing. 
> "What did you put in the paper?" his wife asks. 
> "Here boy!" he replies. 
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> A blond man is in jail. Guard looks in his cell and sees him hanging by his feet. 
> "Just WHAT are you doing?" he asks. 
> "Hanging myself," the blond replies. 
> "It should be around your neck" says the guard. 
> "I tried that," he replies, "but then I couldn't breathe". 
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> (This one actually makes sense...) 
> An Italian tourist asks a blonde man: 
> "Why do Scuba divers always fall backwards off their boats?" 
> To which the blonde man replies: 
> "If they fell forward, they'd still be in the boat." 
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