My best friend's wife treats him like crap. . I asked him, how he can go around calling her "Hon" all the time ? "Yes, Hon", "No Hon", 'Sorry Hon"... He said, he tried calling her Attila once and she broke his nose.

The Devil has announced that his fiddle contest
will no longer be held in Georgia.

A little girl walks into a pet shop.
She walks up to the counter and says, "Excuse me, may I buy a wabbit, pwease?"
The shopkeeper thinks this is just the cutest thing ever. "Sure," he says sweetly. "Do you want a white wabbit or a bwown wabbit?"
The little girl says, "I don't think my pyfon gives a shit."