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Need A Laugh
Posted On: 02/12/2013 4:03:40 PM
Post# of 3036
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Posted By: acc724

We been out shopping too.. 


(This is just too funny! This could only be true; you simply can't 
make this stuff up!) 

Clutching their Kohl's shopping bags, Bonnie and Kay woefully gazed 
down at a dead cat in the mall parking lot. 
Obviously a recent hit..no flies, no smell.. What business could that 
poor kitty have had here?' murmured Bonnie..' 
Come on, Bonnie, let's just go...' 
But Bonnie had already grabbed her shopping bag and was explaining, 
'I'll just put my things in your bag, and then I'll use this tissue...' 
She dumped her purchases into Kay's bag and then used the tissue paper 
to cradle and lower the former feline into her own Kohl's bag and 
cover it. They continued the short trek to the car in silence, 
stashing their goods in the trunk. But it occurred to both of them 
that if they left Bonnie’s burial bag in the trunk, warmed by the Texas 
sunshine while they ate, Kay's Lumina would soon lose that new-car 
smell. 

They decided to leave the bag on top of the trunk, and they headed 
over to K & W Cafeteria. 
They went through the serving line and sat down at a window table. 
They had a view of Kay's Chevy with the Kohl's 
bag still on the trunk. BUT not for long! As they ate, they noticed a 
big black woman in a red gingham shirt stroll by their car.. She 
looked quickly this way and that, and then took the Kohl's bag without 
breaking stride. She quickly walked out of their line of vision.. Kay 
and Bonnie shot each other a wide-eyed look of amazement. 

It all happened so fast that neither of them could think how to 
respond. 'Can you imagine?' finally sputtered Bonnie. 
'The nerve of that woman!' Kay sympathized with Bonnie, but inwardly 
a laugh was building as she thought about the grand surprise 
awaiting the female thief. 

Just when she thought she'd have to giggle into her napkin, she 
noticed Bonnie eyes freeze in the direction of the 
serving line. Following her gaze, Kay recognized the big black woman 
in the red gingham shirt with the Kohl's bag hanging from her arm. She 
was brazenly pushing her tray toward the cashier. 

Helplessly they watched the scene unfold: 
After leaving the register, the woman settled at a table across from 
theirs, put the bag on an empty chair and began 
to eat. After a few bites of baked whitefish and green beans, she 
casually lifted the bag into her lap to survey her treasure. 
Looking from side to side, but not far enough to notice her rapt 
audience three tables over, she pulled out the tissue paper and peered 
into the bag. Her eyes widened, and she began to make a sort of 
gasping noise. The noise grew. The bag slid from her lap as she sank 
to the floor, wheezing and clutching her upper chest. The beverage 
cart attendant quickly recognized a customer in trouble and sent the 
busboy to call 911, while she administered the Heimlich maneuver. 
A crowd quickly gathered that did not include Bonnie and Kay, who 
remained riveted to their chairs for seven whole minutes until the 
ambulance arrived. In a matter of minutes, the big black woman with 
the red gingham shirt emerged, still gasping, and securely strapped on 
a gurney. 

Two well-trained EMT volunteers steered her to the waiting ambulance, 
while a third scooped up her belongings. The 
last they saw of the distressed cat-burglar was as she disappeared 
behind the ambulance doors................the Kohl's Bag perched on 
her stomach!! 


God does take care of those who do bad things! AND once in a 
while...He allows us to witness




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