The Shape I Am In

There's nothing the matter with me,

I'm just as healthy as can be,

I have arthritis in both knees,

And when I talk, I talk with a wheeze.

My pulse is weak, my blood is thin,

But I'm awfully well for the shape I'm in.


All my teeth have had to come out,

And my diet I hate to think about.

I'm overweight and I can't get thin,

But I'm awfully well for the shape I'm in.


And arch supports I need for my feet...

Or I wouldn't be able to go out in the street.

Sleep is denied me night after night,

But every morning I find I'm all right.

My memory's failing, my head's in a spin...

But I'm awfully well for the shape I'm in.