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Posted On: 05/09/2018 7:12:55 PM
Post# of 128502

I went to the doctor’s office and told him, “I feel like such a failure. All 5 of my boys want to be valets when they grow up.”
He said, “Wow, that’s the worst case of parking son’s disease I’ve ever seen.”
A blonde, a brunette & a redhead went into a bar
and asked the bartender for some drinks.
Brunette: “I’ll have a B and C.”
Bartender: “What is a B and C?”
Brunette: “Bourbon and Coke.”
Redhead: “And, I’ll have a G and T.”
Bartender: “What’s a G and T?”
Redhead: “Gin and tonic.”
Blonde: “I’ll have a 15.”
Bartender: “What’s a 15?”
Blonde: “7 and 7?
How much for the gold circle of death?
Sir, they're called Wedding Rings.
My wife called today and said the dishwasher was leaking...
so i came home with tampons...
I'm sleeping on the couch tonight.
I've decided to try my hand at writing diet books.
I'm told they appeal to a very wide audience.
I went back to the card shop yesterday and said, "Do you sell bereavement cards?"
"Yes we do." replied the assistant.
"Good," I said, "could I exchange this 'Get Well Soon' card for one?"
Spice up your confession…
by changing ‘Father’ to ‘Daddy’.
He said, “Wow, that’s the worst case of parking son’s disease I’ve ever seen.”
A blonde, a brunette & a redhead went into a bar
and asked the bartender for some drinks.
Brunette: “I’ll have a B and C.”
Bartender: “What is a B and C?”
Brunette: “Bourbon and Coke.”
Redhead: “And, I’ll have a G and T.”
Bartender: “What’s a G and T?”
Redhead: “Gin and tonic.”
Blonde: “I’ll have a 15.”
Bartender: “What’s a 15?”
Blonde: “7 and 7?
How much for the gold circle of death?
Sir, they're called Wedding Rings.
My wife called today and said the dishwasher was leaking...
so i came home with tampons...
I'm sleeping on the couch tonight.
I've decided to try my hand at writing diet books.
I'm told they appeal to a very wide audience.
I went back to the card shop yesterday and said, "Do you sell bereavement cards?"
"Yes we do." replied the assistant.
"Good," I said, "could I exchange this 'Get Well Soon' card for one?"
Spice up your confession…
by changing ‘Father’ to ‘Daddy’.

