What a douche bag he is. How do you brush your teeth and shave in the morning? In the shower with no mirror I suppose. 'Hey daddy, what did you do in the war"? "I stayed in sick bay, son with a whole bunch of malingering douche bags and tried to swindle people out of their money." "But, but daddy, isn't that dishonest? Like telling lies?"
"It sure is, son, but that's how Daddy puts food on the table, by getting paid to tell lies on the internet." Gee whiz dad, I don't think I want to be just like you when I grow up anymore."